This month in my Fresh Air Fridays community we have been exploring self belief, how we feel about ourselves and how we talk to ourselves. When first looking at the theme during our monthly meeting for facilitators I spent some time with one of my colleagues talking about my self-talk. What I noticed is that my self-talk is very critical and full of language about not being good enough. I was curious and fascinated by this as having done many hours of self development and worked on this before. I know how to re-frame my thinking into positives and use affirmations to create lasting change in my thinking.
So with all these tools at my fingertips, why was I still telling myself I'm not good enough?
What has emerged through thinking about this and discussing it during the Fresh Air Fridays session, is that I have a very deep rooted belief about myself which comes from childhood. Outwardly, I am an adult making grown up decisions about my life and sorting out challenges as they arise. Inwardly, however, there is still a small child there who is lost, unsure and full of fear. What this means for me is that I need to keep working on my positive affirmations particularly when I feel stressed and overwhelmed. The week leading up to my Fresh Air Fridays session had been particularly difficult and challenging; this gave my old self-talk habit of not being good enough an opportunity to start shouting. A walk in the forest with the supportive and like minded friends at Fresh Air Fridays has enabled me to recognise my behaviour, give time to myself to reset things and get back on track.
At Fresh Air Fridays we have three core themes which we touch on every month in addition to our monthly theme. One of these is gratitude and I started with gratitude to help me let go of the self-talk about not being good enough. I've been considering every day what I can be grateful for and this has helped me to re-train my thinking. In addition I've been going out for a walk every day and taking time to appreciate my surroundings, this has helped me with staying in the present and not dwelling on negative thoughts. Finally, being out moving my body and having a more open posture has led to a more positive mindset. The mind and body are very closely connected so changing my body into a postive and open state has an immediate impact on how I'm feeling.
Like our physical health where we have to focus on creating new patterns for excercise and healthy eating if we want to make a change to our bodies; we have to practice and repeat new behaviours daily to establish a new way of thinking and looking after our mental health.
Join me at one of my Fresh Air Friday sessions in August where we will be looking in more depth at our habits, discuss how we can let go of habits that no longer serve us and put in place strategies for creating ones that will serve us.
More detail can be found here